Just wanna put it down somewhere, just in case I forget about it. (My English sucks, so pardon me)
During secondary school, my grade wasn’t the best, but isn’t the worst as well, it’s just normal. Fell in the love for the first time, got rejected for the first time as well. She’s the one that change me, that’s when, every year, i try to find fault in myself and try to change.
Sec 4 - Depression after rejection, screw up my O Level. I asked myself why? Maybe cause I’m not smart enough!
What I Want: Study hard, get good result.
What Happen Later: Scored perfect GPA in ITE, ended up in Poly, Singapore Polytechnic.
Poly Y1 - Realise I can’t make friends well in Poly, people here are different.
What I Want: To be able to socialize well.
What Happen Later: Joined different events as helper, FOC as Group Leader. Able to communicate better.
Poly Y1 - Realise my fashion sense sucks, sport shoe with baggy jeans, Worst.
What I Want: To blend in better and don’t look weird.
What Happen Later: Short pants and slippers, lol.
Poly Y2 - Realise everyone have different talent, design, dance, music, etc.
What I Want: To develop my own talent, even though I might suck at it.
What Happen Later: Got into Photography and start liking it, like, alot.
Poly Y2 (Again) - Realise I lack of Leadership Skills, to lead a team and to manage a team.
What I Want: To improve my Leadership Skills.
What Happen Later: Head of some events, Leader of all my assignment group.
Poly Y3 - Realise I was a fuck up bf.
What I Want: To treat my gf better.
What Happen Later: Got a gf, like her alot, treat her a lot better than my previous.
End of Poly (Graduation) - I had everything I wanted. Graduated with GPA 3.8, with a lot of fun friends, with a gf that i thought loves me alot, an average skill in Photography, a better fashion sense i guess, more confident in leading a team.
I felt, I had everything. Happiest of my life.
Enlisted - Gf ran with another guy, Confident Level drop, takes awhile to pick up myself. Then I realise, i neglected Parents and Friends, they were the one who help me stand up again.
What I Want: Spend more time with Parents and Friend.
What Happen Later: Still need to Spend more time with parents.
2012 (Start) - Met my current gf. My another chance to hold onto someone close. Won’t let her go, for those who’s still trying to jio her, go away la hoh. I love my gf.
2012 (End) - Lost this close friend of mine, hoping she’ll talk to me again. Sometime I can’t help but just waiting for her to forgive me.
2013 - Saw people the same age as me, the Sect Comd, the PC. People who were once the same size as me. But they were bigger size. I realise, i wasn’t big/fit enough.
What I Want: Bigger, not fats, just a bit more muscle.
What Happen Later: Started going to the gym, hoping to see the differences soon.
I felt that, everyone can change as long as they realise which part of their is the bad side of them. And i know one day i’ll think “My english sucks, lets improve it”, but yeah I’ll let it come naturally~
Life is short, just change whatever you think will make you into a better person.
So, that one girl that rejected me on my birthday when i was sec 3, has changed my life. Becoming who i am now.
And ya, i love my gf although she keep on asking me to stop going to the gym.